🌿 Temperament Transformation Reflection
🔴 Choleric Blends
“Understand Me Before You Judge Me”
💖 Let’s Grow in Understanding Together
Sometimes we misread strength as harshness, and confidence as arrogance. But when we slow down to understand how God wired each of us, we begin to see not just personalities — but purpose.
Today, we’re leaning in to hear from our Choleric sisters — strong-willed, goal-driven women who often carry the weight of responsibility with intensity and determination. While they may come across as direct or even controlling, their hearts often long to protect, lead, and accomplish God’s will with excellence.
Let’s pause and give space for their voice.
This is your moment to better understand them — and yourself — as we continue learning what it means to truly love our neighbours as ourselves (Mark 12:31). 💬🔥
🪞 Reflection
As we walk in obedience to Christ’s call to love one another, it’s easy to misinterpret someone’s temperament. Assertiveness can be mistaken for pride, and silence for rejection. But every blend carries both strengths and struggles that deserve compassion.
Today, let’s choose understanding over assumption.
Let’s listen before labeling, and reflect before reacting.
📖 Scripture Focus
“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
— Proverbs 15:1 (NASB)
🔥 A Message from the Choleric Blends
👉 "When I come across as intense or too direct, please don’t assume I’m angry — what I really need you to know is that __________."
✍️ Choleric sisters:
Complete the sentence honestly and share your truth with the group in the comments section below. You may type it out or copy and paste. We really look forward to hearing from you.
💭 Optional Ways to Complete the Sentence:
-
"...I’m passionate about what I believe and want to get things done."
-
"...I’m trying to help, not hurt — but I may not always soften my tone."
-
"...I feel responsible for making things right and move quickly to fix them."
-
"...I want to see results and get frustrated with delays."
-
"...I value clarity and sometimes forget to consider how my words land."
-
"...I’m not trying to dominate, I’m trying to lead and protect."
-
"...I struggle with patience and need grace when I'm still learning to slow down."
✨ Feel free to write your own if none of these fully capture your heart. Your voice matters.
💬 ✍️ Complete the sentences below:
• I can better understand someone who comes across as intense or overly direct by…
• I can be a loving presence when a Choleric sister is battling inner pressure or frustration by…
💭 Optional Answers Below to Help You Reflect and Respond:
• I can better understand someone who comes across as intense or overly direct by…
-
…realizing they may be passionate, not angry.
-
…listening for their heart, not just their tone.
-
…not taking their urgency personally.
-
…remembering they value action and clarity.
-
…recognizing that their boldness doesn’t mean they don’t care how I feel.
• I can be a loving presence when a Choleric sister is battling inner pressure or frustration by…
-
…letting her know I’m here to support her without getting in her way.
-
…praying for her to find rest and peace in the Lord.
-
…giving her space to lead but gently reminding her she doesn’t have to carry everything alone.
-
…affirming her efforts and reminding her she’s valued beyond her performance.
-
…offering help without making her feel like she’s losing control.
🙌 Let’s Grow in Grace Together
Your voice matters.
📝 In the Comment Section of the Blog:
-
Choleric Sisters: Post your completed sentence.
-
Other Blends: Share your answers.
🕊️ Let love lead. Let assumptions fall. Let understanding rise.
Wishing everyone a wonderful Wednesday!
%20OR%20LEAN%20IN%20(Choose%20two%20or%20more%20letters).png)
Hey Fellow Wisdom Seekers,
ReplyDeleteGreetings to each of you! I wanted to take a moment to share a little piece of my heart as we continue walking through this beautiful and sometimes challenging journey of temperament transformation together.
There was a time — not too long ago — when I didn’t fully understand the way I was wired. I knew I was Choleric. I knew I was driven, focused, goal-oriented. But what I didn’t know was how those untransformed traits were affecting the people around me.
To be honest, not many people came out and told me directly, “You hurt me” or “You came across too strong.” (Occasionally my children did.) But now, looking back with clearer eyes and a softer heart, I can see it. I can see how my low tolerance for sloppiness, pettiness, or tardiness may have caused me to unintentionally dismiss others. I didn’t realize how my silence, impatience, or intensity could feel like rejection to someone else.
My tolerance level was almost zero. And honestly? I thought I was just being efficient — focused, a fixer. But what I truly needed wasn’t just direction in my actions; I needed a transformation that would refine my attitude, soften my edges, and shape my heart to reflect Christ more clearly.
But God — oh, how good He’s been. His grace has been so real in my life. Slowly, gently, He’s been peeling back the layers. He’s been showing me not just what I do, but who I am — and even more, who He’s shaping me to become. Oh, how I praise Him that!
I’m learning that my temperament isn’t meant to control or bulldoze others — it’s meant to be molded for His glory.
So if I come across as too intense or too direct, please don’t assume I’m angry. What I really want you to know is:
I care deeply.
I see a need, and I just want to help.
I love seeing things get done, I want to protect what matters, and I long to lead with purpose.
But I also know I don’t always communicate that well.
I’m still learning to slow down.
Still learning to be patient.
Still learning how to speak with gentleness and grace.
But here's the beautiful part: God is still working on me.
Just like He’s still working on you.
And I’m reminded of the powerful words in 2 Corinthians 3:18 —
"But we all, with unveiled faces, looking as in a mirror at the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit." What a text! A text to memorize and to grasp its full meaning.
So Sistas, I’m not there yet, but getting there. So "please be patient with me, for God is not through with me yet..."😊
A great day to all!
Thank you for sharing this . Amen
DeleteMy Choleric Sisters 👯♀️
DeleteGood morning 🌞
And to all my others sisters ..
Understand me before you judge me ..
A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
— Proverbs 15:1 (NASB)
I can better understand someone who comes across as intense or overly direct by…
1. …realizing they may be passionate, not angry.
2. …listening for their heart, not just their tone.
3. …not taking their urgency personally.
• I can be a loving presence when a Choleric sister is battling inner pressure or frustration by…
1. giving her space to lead but gently reminding her she doesn’t have to carry everything alone.
Blessed Thursday to all🌺
Well written Lady Gale! I must attest, I am noticing the changes in you and as I learn more about your temperament, I am understanding you better. Continue to allow God to transform you into the woman He has called you to be! Keep it up! The grandchildren will greatly appreciate this version of you!!
DeleteThank you for sharing my First Lady Gale.
DeleteSo much of what you shared resonated with me, especially with what I do, the things I say, and the way I think. Because I also share part of your choleric blend. I am still battling with the sharpness or even coming across harsh. I can vividly remember myself being distant, trying to figure out if I should get close or stay far in our connection, but then I saw you operating as the pastor's wife and didn't know how to mix the role with the relation.
Nevertheless, as time passed by, it got a bit easier for me as I try to view thing from behind your lends.... I still didn't have it right until we interacted with the personality traits and now the Temperament. Oh boy, that was an eye opener for me.
Sister Penny, I truly hear your heart. Thank you for being open and transparent with us. It’s always a good thing when we understand why others do the things they do. I agree with Dr. Truds. I have seen changes in you. You are more patient
Deletewith others.❤️❤️💕. Thank you for leading by example.
Thank you all for the extra personal comments. Appreciated.
Delete🌺
DeleteDeborah
ReplyDeleteSHALOM,SHALOM WS FAM ❤
I can better understand someond who come across as imtense or overly direvt by :
Listening for their heart not just their tone.
I can be loving presence when Choleric sisters battling inner pressure or frustration by:
Offering help without makimg her feel like she's losing control.
Letting her kmow I'm here to support her without getting in her wsy.
Be bless everybody
❤ Uall deeply
CHAAW.......🤣
Good morning ladies!!
ReplyDeleteI can better understand someone who comes across as intense or overly direct by……realizing they may be passionate, not angry.
I can be a loving presence when a Choleric sister is battling inner pressure or frustration by……giving her space to lead but gently reminding her she doesn’t have to carry everything alone.
Have a wonderful day!
Thank you Sis Penny for sharing
ReplyDeleteGood morning my Choleric Sisters.
ReplyDeleteI can better understand someone who comes across as intense or overly direct by…realizing they may be passionate, not angry.
I can be a loving presence when a Choleric sister is battling inner pressure or frustration by… …giving her space to lead but gently reminding her she doesn’t have to carry everything alone.
Hello ladies! Hope you're all doing well~
ReplyDeleteI can better understand someone who comes across as intense or overly direct by remembering they value action and clarity and by recognizing that their boldness doesn’t mean they don’t care how I feel.
- I love the part in the reading that says, "While they may come across as direct or even controlling, their hearts often long to protect, lead, and accomplish God’s will with excellence."
It's important to remember that God is using our Choleric sisters to accomplish His purpose; we cannot harshly judge them for how God wired them. Through the transformational power. of the Holy Spirit, I pray they gracefully accomplish God's will. I am learning to 'see their heart' and not just their action/tone. God looks at our motives/heart, we should also learn to look at the heart of others.
I can be a loving presence when a Choleric sister is battling inner pressure or frustration by letting her know I’m here to support her without getting in her way.
- I have found that effectively and efficiently working alongside my Choleric sisters is a great way to get things done and to allow them to deal with whatever inner pressure/frustration their dealing with. Most time, it's the lack of efficiency/productivity around them that gets them upset - so by supporting and helping, this is a great way to assist them.
Have a great day everyone~
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteGood day WS,
ReplyDeleteUnderstand Me Before You Judge Me
• I can better understand someone who comes across as intense or overly direct by…
…realizing they may be passionate, not angry.
…listening for their heart, not just their tone.
…not taking their urgency personally.
…recognizing that their boldness doesn’t mean they don’t care how I feel.
• I can be a loving presence when a Choleric sister is battling inner pressure or frustration by…
…letting her know I’m here to support her without getting in her way.
…praying for her to find rest and peace in the Lord.
Enjoy the rest of the day.
Greetings my fellow Women.
ReplyDeleteTemperament Transformation Reflection
🔴 Choleric Blends
“Understand Me Before You Judge Me”
💖 Let’s Grow in Understanding Together
Melancholic/Choleric Blend.
Today I can definitely say without a doubt, that I understand what it means and how it feels to judge someone or to be judged by others, or to come across as being too direct or harsh.
My Choleric blend, I affirm that it is not because we are angry, but it is because we are passionate about what we are doing and feels the need to just want to get it done.
Lady Gale, you have encouraged and inspired me today, I have been making conscious efforts to be mindful of my actions, holding myself accountable and repenting at times whenever I faulter.
Thank you taking us through this journey, I am better able to understand myself, and I try hard to refrain from the triggers that will cause me to snap at the children or even my husband at times.
To my other choleric blend sisters on the chat, I am with you in this struggle, we do not have to get it right, and we cannot do everything now, so let us support each other.
My pray:
I pray that Almighty God will favor us as we realign our thoughts and actions with His word. May we seek His grace to become more patience as we grow through this transformational journey, and may we find rest and peace in Jesus name Amen!!
❤️🌺
DeleteGood Day Sisters
ReplyDeleteCholeric Blends
“Understand Me Before You Judge Me”
• I can better understand someone who comes across as intense or overly direct by…
1. Realizing they may be passionate, not angry
2. Recognizing that their boldness doesn’t mean they don’t care how I feel.
• I can be a loving presence when a Choleric sister is battling inner pressure or frustration by…
1. Praying for her to find rest and peace in the Lord.
2. Giving her space to lead but gently reminding her she doesn’t have to carry everything alone.
All these answers will help me understand the Choleric Sisters and myself as well.
Have a Great rest of your day 💕
Hello ladies!
ReplyDeleteunderstand me before you judge me.
Choleric sisters;
• I can better understand someone who comes across as intense or overly direct by…recognizing that their boldness doesn’t mean they don’t care how I feel
• I can be a loving presence when a Choleric sister is battling inner pressure or frustration by…giving her space to lead but gently reminding her she doesn’t have to carry everything alone.
Have a good evening everyone!
Hello ladies,
ReplyDeleteTessie
Choleri/Melancholic
When I come across as intense or too direct, please don’t assume I’m angry — what I really need you to know is that.
Up on till about the third decade of my life I have heard this, "your tone is too strong". Please know that
I had to be trained or thought to be a better me. That is to train my tone to behave. I grew up being a very liberal individual, very honest and I also had the attitude that once it is true I had no business holding it back. I had little consideration for others feelings, my thoughts were, "deal with it".
The word of God started really affecting my thinking deeply after I turned thirty there about. I realized that my purpose is to truly build up and strengthen the people around me. I remembered some of the things others would say to me, such as , you are too outspoken, you are too bossy, you need to leave things alone for the moment.
I realized that all of these things are wonderful qualities but I needed to harness the way I deal with them.
In keeping with change I started listening to people around me, I started understanding my personality type through various forums at church and reading I had a better understanding of how I was wired and the dangers I am capable of. I am always big on accomplishing whatever I put my mind to, so training my personality type became a task, I started paying more attention to my interactions with others. Over the years I have become better at approaching different situations, perfection is not completed but by Gods' grace I am hoping he will say well done.
If my intensity have offended you and my direct approach cause you displeasure, please know that God is continually working on me.
I really need you all to know I love who God has created me to be, I am in the business of making me a better individual by Gods' grace, and I deeply care about each one of you. ❤️
👍🏼 Thanks for sharing Sister Tessie!
Delete🌺❤️
DeleteHello everyone
ReplyDeleteMay 22, 2025
“Understand Me Before You Judge Me”.
I can better understand someone who comes across as intense or overly direct by realizing they may be passionate, not angry... recognizing that their boldness doesn't mean they don't care how I feel.
I can be a loving presence when a Choleric sister is battling inner pressure or frustration by letting her know I 'm here to support her without getting in her way...offering help without making her feel like
she's losing control.
Blessing and good night.
Thanks Choleric sisters for sharing your heart.
Ladies, thanks for your various input today. Blessings!
ReplyDeleteMay 22nd
ReplyDeleteUnderstand me before you judge me
Choleric blends
Hello everyone
I can better understand who comes across as intense or overly direct by
Listening for their heart, not just their tone
not taking their urgency personally.
I can be a loving presence when a Choleric sits battling inner pressure or frustration by
letting her know I'm here to support her without getting in her way.
Blessings.
Howdy WS ,
ReplyDeleteHope you all had a great day 😊
Choleric Blends
“Understand Me Before You Judge Me”
Reflect and Respond:
• I can better understand someone who comes across as intense or overly direct by realizing they may be passionate, not angry
As well as listening for their heart, not just their tone.
• I can be a loving presence when a Choleric sister is battling inner pressure or frustration by-praying for her to find rest and peace in the Lord and giving her space to lead but gently reminding her she doesn’t have to carry everything alone.
Choleric Blends we value you!💕
Blessing night🙏💤
Just a few months ago, I had the opportunity to complete the temperament quiz. At first glance, I thought, “Hmm…I might be a Sanguine 🤩,” because they are the enthusiastic type. However, after completing the quiz, my type turned out to be Choleric 💪.
ReplyDeleteAt first, I thought, “No way, José—me, a Choleric?!” But after some reflection and reviewing past interactions with others, I was convinced. I am who I am: a Choleric—and I accepted my type ✅.
For me, it isn’t about being controlling or harsh 😤. My tone always seems to be an issue for others, but from my perspective, I just think, “If there’s a better way to do something, I’d rather give my input—whether you like it or not.”
I’m not being rude when I make suggestions—at least that’s what I think 🤷🏽♂️.
Earlier this year, I had a co-worker who didn’t appreciate my tone 😕. What I saw as “nothing” was taken the wrong way. I think people who don’t understand my temperament focus too much on how something is communicated—specifically the tone—instead of the point I’m trying to make.
What’s valuable to me is that you understand what I’m trying to say 💬, rather than dwell on the tone, which I often see as irrelevant when trying to reach a conclusion 🎯.
Even as I write this, I’m hoping and praying 🙏 that my words are not misinterpreted.
I think I have a looooong way to go when it comes to adjusting my tone 🛠️. It’s something I have to be more conscious of. I need to observe others’ facial expressions and reactions 👀 so I don’t unintentionally hurt them 💔.
Just know—when I say what I say—my intention isn’t to be harsh, rude, or controlling. I just want the best possible outcome for the situation 🌟.
I’m results over tone 📈. Look beyond my tone! 👀